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Monday, June 3, 2013

`Unofficial` Mothers

As you knew, I just lost two women that played important role in my life.
A grandmother (my grandmother`s sister)
and an Aunty...moreover, A godmother.
While my sister can make tributes to them beautifully
I found myself could not do it.
I felt a slight guilt about it.

But, today, I think the only thing that I can do and I want to do is
pondering on their lives.
Until they finally met their God, they are not married.
Despite of that, they have been a terrific mother to me, my sisters, and cousins.

Silently, Oma Ota, in her absence of words, only voices,
She has served the family with all of her might
I and her sometimes had a fight, maybe because she and I did not understand each other, most of the times, 
because of her disability and my impatience.
She cared about us,
She helped right about everything 
about household matters,
looking after the children, while our parents out working,
making sure we eat our food.
washing the clothes,
making up our bed
especially when the maid were out of town for the Ied vacation.
She can not hear us, yet, she understood our needs; with or without gestures,
She was the queen of neat, sometimes we even got trouble in finding our things because she already make all of the things stored so it will not be that messy.

On the other hand, Mama Grace, has been a vibrant career woman,
She has served the family with laughter, words, and even songs.
As my sister said, she has been a cool aunt for us
She has been our `running place` when we were not in a good mood with our own mother,
We told her our secrets (although probably she would tell her sister about those things xD )
She took us to cool places
To me (and I think to my sisters and cousins too), she is our role model
Personally, at some point, I really want to be like her
I do not even mind if I will not get married,
I want to be like her,
my friend, even said, she has been her role model also.
a living proof, that even without any relationship, she survived the pressure of being unmarried
Even to her subordinates, she was like their mother, protecting them yet nurturing them
with hard way, making them stronger.

Their lives made me think
You do not have to be married to be a mother
If you are married and can be a mother, good for you!
And I do not discredit every biological mother in this world, including my own mom. 
But I want to give the high credit, as high as towards all the biological mother,
to all 'unofficial' mothers in the world
They who are not married
yet, have been serving others, consciously or unconsciously,
As a mother

Women who are not  married yet
  give ears to those who needs to be heard
  give advices to those who are in doubtful situation
 let their nieces stay overnight after having fights with their loved ones
 encourage their ordinates to overcome the obstacles and always at their best in doing their responsibilities
 serve with songs
 serve in silence
 pray everyday for people they love
 are very annoying when their nieces haven`t got new dresses for some special occasions
 buy presents for the family members during Christmas
 get angry when you do not do your homework, get home late, being irresponsible, or even, when you have annoying hairstyle.

To those `unofficial` mothers in this world,
Be proud!
Society might underestimate or mock you because you have not married yet,
People might accuse you of being putting standard too high,
too busy chasing your career,
too fool to turn down the marriage offer from someone you know is not for you
too selfish
Well, they can say whatever they want
But they can not take away
your unconditional love
your people who love you for your sacrifice you have done for them
Always remember,
You are always loved.
God bless you. 

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